In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, all in one God.
Does God Hate Women?
God, I hope you are not reading this and if you are please don’t take it the wrong way. I have always wondered why women are portrayed so badly in the Bible. Why are they seen as evil, ignorant, replaceable, and as men’s property? The Bible is our means of communication with God. We learn the ways of being a Christ follower through the words that are written in there. So, the way men treat women, especially if they are religious Christians, it may come from what they have learned from the Bible, which scares me because the Bible doesn’t seem to value women. This is personal to me because as a woman, I go through a lot of sexism and I would hate to think it all started from the Bible. Some verses in the Bible seem to be degrading women. For example, 1 Corinthians 14:34-35 says, "Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law. And if they will learn anything, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church." Why must we be silent and why are men ordered to keep us quite? Why did God allow these poor presumptions of women to become part of the Bible? Does God hate women?
Elizabeth: Oh my gosh, I thought you couldn’t shock me anymore but you have done it again. What in the world are you talking about? You can’t be serious?
Sina: I am, I just feel like the Bible is not fair to women sometimes.
Elizabeth: One thing I have learned over the journey of my spiritual life is that obedience goes a long way. The foundation of becoming a Christ follower is having faith. As long as we are not theologians, we will have many unanswered questions but when you have faith those questions are not pressing. In fact, once we have the Orthodox phronema, our questions will be irrelevant or we will already have the answers without asking. When you believe, you understand; don't try to understand first so you can believe. A great preacher said, “one of the best things about being an Orthodox is knowing when to shut up.” We don’t all need to be theologians, we just need to pray. Great theologians are not those who went to school, they are those who know how to pray.
Sina: Obedience is one of my areas of struggle. I am working on it. I do wish to have enough faith not to question God, but until I am at that stage, I will be bothering you. So, you don’t feel like the Bible is unfair sometimes?
Elizabeth: No. I also know for sure God doesn’t hate women. There are certain hierarchies set in place. One of the hierarchy is men are the head of the household and women should obey men. Even Jesus obeyed God His father to show us the importance of obedience. If Jesus had the heart of obedience why can’t we?
Sina: But why are women the ones who have to obey, why can men be the ones who have to obey?
Elizabeth: God created Adam in his image and woman came from Adam. The way I understand it, women and men are equal in God’s eyes. Someone once explained to me the difference between men and women is like the right and left arm. They are both equally useful in different ways and they have different functions to serve.
Sina: If women and men are equal in God’s eyes than God must not hate women. But why and how did women end up with such a terrible fate of abuse and sexism?
Elizabeth: God did not tell men to abuse women or be sexist towards women. In fact, God told Adam to take care of women and to fulfill her needs. God loves men and women equally. He created both of them to live in harmony. I can only blame Satan for corrupting some men’s thoughts and actions to abuse women.
Sina: Ummm
Elizabeth: To piggyback off what you said earlier, the Bible is indeed an example of what to do, but it is an example of what not to do as well. God showed us through the lives of His followers and those of not, how to be true Christians. He punished the sinners and rewarded those who were on the right path. There were many men in the Bible who raped and abused women but God did not instruct them to do it nor was He pleased with their sins.
Sina: Okay then let’s talk about the things God did allow, for example, 1 Corinthians 14:34-35. Why did God say women should be silent at church? Also, why are women instructed to be submissive to men?
Elizabeth: I have to ask my deacon friend or my confessional father for that question, however, what I do know is that God thinks we are special. I heard a priest tell a story about an angel who asked God why He created Eve last? God said to him, Eve was last because she is the creation to complete all the other creations. The angel continued, then why did you give her so much to bear and God said because she is the only one who can handle it. Eve is flexible, a multitasker, adaptive, smart, nurturing, and emotionally intelligent. Struck by what he has never noticed, the angle was at awe with Eve, and he said a woman is indeed a special creature favored by God. After hearing what the father said, I was reminded of the saying my grandpa used to say, “asha sebeyti, sebiaya yehmqa” meaning foolish wife is outsmarted by her husband. It makes the point that no women should feel inferior to men unless she is foolish. We women actually have more power than we realize, it’s just a matter of knowing how to exercise it. You can think of men as the president and women as the congress. The congress makes laws that influence its citizens and the president enforces the law.
Deacon: Now you ladies are talking about politics too?
Sina: You know us, we love talking. But what we love even more is stealing your knowledge. Now that you are here, we have some questions for you.
Deacon: No worries, you ladies always bring up good questions. I guess you are talking about women.
Elizabeth: Yeah, specifically Saint Paul’s message to Corinthians (1 Cor 14:34-35) regarding women’s role in the church. Can you explain why the apostle said women should not speak in the church?
Deacon: It’s not an easy question, so bear with me as I try to explain it based on Homilies of Saint John Chrysostom. At that time, when Saint Paul gave the command, women were talking at church as if it was a marketplace. They were engaged in conversations about unprofitable subjects. Thus, they were confused and did not understand any of the teachings. Hence, the need for the command. One cannot learn anything that is useful by talking. The order is also to remind women of modesty, which is more adorning than any garment. When clothed with modesty, women can offer their prayers in the manner most acceptable to God.
Sina: Basically, Saint Paul instructed women to be silent at church because they were talking about worldly matters. The reason for his command was so they can hear more and understand more.
Deacon: Yes, and Saint Paul made sure to clarify that his order comes from the law of God. Our Lord said, “Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you” (Genesis 3:16). A woman is to have a servants heart. Plus there was no reason for any women or men to speak at a church. Only teachers and temple servants were allowed to speak in a church.
Elizabeth: Yeah, and they were instructed to be taught by their husbands at home because the home is a safer place for women to freely express their emotions without judgment and with the protection of their husbands.
Deacon: Furthermore, Saint Paul continues, “For it is shameful for a woman to speak in the church.” Going back to the beginning of time, death came because Eve listened and spoke to the serpent, ultimately falling in sin. So, speaking became shameful for Eve because it caused her to sin. The verse also speaks to the hierarchy state that Adam was created first and Eve was created for him. So, when there are men at the church, first priority to speak is given to them, for the same reason that women can’t be priests. Everyone has different roles at church, one role is not more special than the other and women’s role is to listen and to serve in modest ways.
Elizabeth: All said, women are special in God’s eyes and very valued at our church. After all, we were saved through a woman. God looked everywhere and couldn't find anyone as pure as Saint Mary to dwell in. Our church fathers refer to her saying, “tehti fetari, leli futurat” meaning under God, above creatures. Women were also the first to see Him after His resurrection. If you see the story of our saints, there were plenty of women who were favored in God’s eyes and set as an example of Christian life. Also, our church is referred to as a woman, so are the Holy Trinity. Lastly, without women, there wouldn’t be Holy Communion, which would be a significant loss. The communion allows us to eat the flesh and drink the blood of Jesus Christ, ultimately becoming one with Him. Jesus the Son of God was born as a man and He chose to take the blood and flesh of Saint Mary, an honor that is greater than any on this earth.
Sina: Thanks guys, everything you said makes me realize how loved we are by God both men and women. He has continuously showered us with His grace even when we don’t deserve it.
Deacon: Exactly, He loves us regardless of our genders, more than we will ever comprehend and at the end of the day that’s all that matters.
Sina: I am sorry for always questioning everything. I do realize my arrogance. I know our God is too magnificent to be understood by a mere human like me. He is our creator and for that reason alone we don’t have the capacity to unfold His works and mystery. It’s just that answers make me feel closer to Him.
Elizabeth: It’s okay to have questions, just remember everything good cannot be seen and everything magnificent might not be explained.
Glory to God!
Sina, Beza-natu, & Elizabeth
References:
https://st-takla.org/books/en/ecf/112/1120041.html
https://st-takla.org/books/en/ecf/113/1130101.html
https://st-takla.org/books/en/ecf/113/1130102.html
